ARE YOU A DEAD MAN WALKING?

DEAD MAN WALKING

It is the beginning of another year. In the past 12 months, I have observed so much deaths, so much pain, so much violence, so much injustice, so much evils perpetrated by men and women, and so much sorrow, that it became clear to me that each of us is nothing but a dead man walking!

Have you seen the dead man walking? He is very eager to identify with his ‘people’: relatives, friends and family members. He visits his village regularly, attends family reunions every year where they discuss the latest gossips. They talk about who died and who was born that year, who got married, and who divorced. Each year he wonders who will be the next to be buried. Perhaps it will be him, for he is a dead man walking.

He goes to work early in the morning and returns very late in the evening. He has little or no time for his family. He hates his job and often feels threatened by his boss and fellow workers, whom he believes are after his job and his life. Yet he must continue going to work every day, and keeps wondering how long he will continue like this, and wonders if he is the next person to die. Perhaps it will be him, for he is a dead man walking.

He works so hard with a lot of stress. He embezzles money from his office, money meant for government projects, and keeps them in the bank. He puts away more money for insurance: group insurance, tribal insurance and personal savings. Several of his friends have been in car accidents, natural disasters have destroyed their houses, and some lost their family members due to accidents and disease, and he wonders if such calamities will visit him. So he takes precautions so that he won’t be caught by surprise. But why is he so afraid? It is because he realizes that he is already a dead man walking.

Every Sunday he goes to church to see mostly the same people doing the same things. He observes people go to pastors to pray for the same favour for which they have prayed for years, as if God was deaf. He often wonders how much of their religious practice they actually believe and truly understand. They read the scriptures, sing same melodious songs, and listen to sermons and make some resolutions to change the world but without any commitment to change their own lives. Every week or so, there is a funeral as a church member passes on, accompanied by the usual cries and sobs, followed by eating and drinking with lots of chatter, as if nothing really happened.

Sometimes, he is apprehensive to go to his place of worship, knowing that he will hear the names of those who have recently died. However, he knows that the church will someday announce his departure, for he is a dead man walking.

He had been very lonely in the past, but then he met his wife. He expected her to make him happy and totally satisfied. He was sure that he had found his better half and the missing bone in his rib. He was sure that he has found the key too happiness. The problem, however, is that she too was expecting the same thing from him. They each wanted happiness and satisfaction from each other. What they got was disappointment and frustration because they expected too much from each other. They forgot that real, lasting happiness can only be found in God.

He became a politician. He inflates contracts by as much as 500% so as to make much money, and he prides himself for being a very clever democrat. Yet his money does not give him happiness he craves for, for no one gets happiness by exploiting other people. No one becomes happy by making others unhappy. In fact, the only way to be happy is to make other happy. He wonders if there is more to than making money and profits. As he grows older, the reality of death stares him in the face, and it dawns on him that he is only a dead man walking.

He spends most of his life in fear. He has little time to be himself or feel good about himself or to enjoy the little lifespan that God gave to him. Rather, he spends his time worrying about petty things and brooding over petty quarrels and disappointments, and visits one miracle house and the other, where he believes he will find quick and cheap solutions to his problems.

At the end he becomes so overwhelmed that he collapses and dies. But his death had actually occurred  much earlier. He died before his death, for he was a dead man walking. Have you ever met the dead man walking? The dead man walking is every one of us because we all tend to pursue shadows and base our self-identity on job security, nationality, tribe, family, romance, wealth, power and prestige. We often view these as the essence of life, considering everything else to be secondary. We forget that all these concerns are relative and temporal. Sooner than later, we will change, others will change, and circumstances will change. Most importantly, Death is inevitable and is just around the corner for each and every person.

 Most people think that they cannot succeed without stress. The truth is that you can succeed without stress. You don’t need to carry the world’s problems on your shoulder. Why would you anyway? After all, the problems are there before you came, and they are likely to remain after you are gone. Rather, you should do your best and leave the rest.